Theatre Calendar

David, a recently retired senior civil servant, is finding retirement to be a crushing bore. His days are a tedious cycle of complaining about his barking dog and dodging his excruciatingly dull friend, Philip. But his mundane world is shattered when a gift arrives: a mysterious Caribbean wooden mask that holds an incredible secret. After a polish, the mask summons Jean, a wish-fulfiller who operates less like a genie and more like a slick corporate agent with a strict set of terms and conditions.

David is granted three wishes, but his cynical and careless choices lead to catastrophic and hilarious results. A casual remark wishing Philip wasn't so boring leads to his friend's untimely demise in a hit-and-run... involving David's own car! With the police closing in and his life spiralling into a supernatural farce, David must use his final wish to try and escape the mess he's created. It’s a riotous descent into magical mix-ups and mortal mayhem where one man’s grumpiness escalates into an unbelievable crisis.

Step into the seemingly quiet village hall of Lingering Slaughter for the monthly drama society meeting. The agenda is thrown into chaos by the arrival of Samantha, an ambitious new member armed with a folder full of grand ideas and corporate jargon. She proposes that the small amateur group should stage Shakespeare's epic, four-hour tragedy Cymbeline.

The suggestion is met with stunned silence and barely concealed amusement by the society's stalwarts: Angela, the good-natured farmer who chairs the club, and June, the cynical, long-serving secretary renowned for her questionable home-baking. What follows is a masterclass in passive-aggression and provincial wit as June and Angela run rings around the pretentious newcomer. From a secret-recipe marmite cake to a hilariously unfortunate acronym for Samantha's previous job title, this is a delightful clash of worlds. Will Samantha's grand vision win them over, or is her proposal about to get the chop?